Breaking the frames #When Clothes don’t fit me…

The society builds for its members certain kinds of frames in which everyone is expected to fit regardless of their features and their choices. The one who doesn’t fits is criticized , tormented, made to be afraid and finally crushed.

Female are always told what to wear and what not. Sometimes I wonder all people see in a women is her ‘appropriateness’ ( like if they get sometime offstaring at their skin). It doesn’t matter if you are a girl next door or a celebrity like Priyanka Chopra. ( C’mon its her choice as to what to wear while meeting the PM and believe me she looked just perfect.)

We all are fighting and struggling with it, either in silence or through rebellion. Let me a share a small conservation I had with an uncle who leaves in my neighbourhood which gave me some sense of satisfaction.

So the scene was that a few students were waiting for their bus in the morning. One of the girls was a wearing salwar suit ( for my foreign friends, its a an ethnic Indian dress) which is actually her school uniform. Her father, who can be perceived as a perfect sample of men overeaten by stereotypes in particular to “ideal way a women should behave”, commented that girls don’t look good in skirts . So salwar suits should be the school uniform of every school. After all salwar suit is the traditional attire of India and we must stick to our culture. And then he gave a long speech on its pros . He ended himself with weird kind of a pride in his eyes which also awaited a round of thundering praises and cheers.

I could feel my blood boiling. But when he glanced at me expecting an approval, I decided to agree with him.

“Yes Uncle. You are absolutely right . Why not?”

” But just one thing, if culture is everything you care about.then boys should also be made to wear dhoti kurta to school. Because as far as I remember trousers and shirts are of English origin.”

” And if the matter is something else, then please Uncle be kind enough to keep it with yourself. Thank you!”

His face made an awkward position that reflected his distaste over my view point but I didn’t  care.

Let me make one thing clear, through this post I don’t want to fight for a girl’s right to wear skirts or short dresses, but a girl’s freedom to wear whatever she likes and wants, Freedom that she won’t be judged by her clothes. A girl wearing a skirt will not be seen as ‘characterless’ and the one wearing a saree will not be underestimated and disregarded as behen ji.

I am not restricted to my clothes…i am beyond material!

share your thoughts with me and with one another

stereotypes will freeze if we will not break the ice !

College Confusion

Hey Guys!

Well, my board results have come and yes I am very happy with my percentage. But it was accompanied by a lot of confusion.

Wait I’ll explain you.

First of all, I want to make a career for myself in journalism and mass communication but I want to take it up at post graduation level. For my graduation, I want to take up some course that would help me build a knowledge base. So after a lot of thinking, I decided to go for Political Science Honours.

But yet another dilemma awaited me….the GREAT COLLEGE CONFUSION.For sure I want to get into Delhi University. I am confused between LSR and Hindu.

LSR is at a higher rank than Hindu. But the problem with it is that, first it is very far off from my place and second it is a very isolated college. Hindu, on the other hand is in North campus of Delhi University which like a dream place and has a fabulous and lively atmosphere.

So right now, the state of my mind is a little unsettled. I want to go for the best. Let see where I land!

P.S.-Please give me your suggestions, what do you think and what you would have done if you were at my place.

All You Need

Sometimes

All you need is a person

Who listens to you

Quietly

When you can’t control emotions

All you need is a person

Who gives you the freedom to

Confide darkest confessions

Who neither comments

Nor questions

Who remains quiet and just listens to you

When you feel burdened, dejected, broken

Wounded by words

Or

Provoked by anger

All you need is someone

Who refuses to be judgmental

Who doesn’t gauge the depth of your emotions

Who doesn’t want to control them

Sometimes

All you need is a person

Who just listens without responding

Without reflecting

Without keeping anything for long

Sometime all you need is someone

Just someone.

Thought that Board exams left me with……

Hello Everyone!

Finally I am back. My exams went well and yes I survived them. Frankly speaking , on the last day of my ‘ class 12th board exams’, it was actually hard to digest the fact that they are really over. I mean all the frenzy around this ‘ life determining’ exam had come to end and the funny part is that I felt some kind of a void in life.

Nonetheless , I am back to normal debarring a few times when the thought of results gives me jitters and then I bounce back to reality with a positive thought that since I have worked so hard, the fruit is going to be sweet.

Let me tell you something that has been brewing in my mind since the last day of my exams. After  my psychology paper which was the last one, I came home and called my teacher. We were discussing the answers of some difficult questions and I had all of them right but to my dismay I got one of the questions wrong in Section A which was the easiest section. I was completely disheartened . I was telling myself that “you got that wrong otherwise you had a chance of securing full marks.” I withdrew myself and sat with hung and pale face wondering about the 2 marks I had lost. I felt my heart paining.

But suddenly some kind of a voice inside me said, ” Hey wait! You can’t demean all the questions which you got right for just one question.” This took e into another line of thought and a number of questions and answers started erupting in me.

” Have I defined happiness so narrowly for myself?”

” Yes you have and It’s not right.”

” Today I lost two marks and I am so sad. Later in life I may lose many things. Will then sadness completely engulf me?”

” If things go the way they are right now, yes it will.”

” So then this means that I will never be happy in life because my frame of happiness is too small and rigid?”

” Yes again. Happiness is subjective. It is a reward we give to ourselves. If we can be happy only if we chose it for ourselves. Happiness can be made so strong that it can overshadow all kinds of pains and remain with us in all circumstances.”

I was no more sad. I decided to be happy for things I have done right in exams. I realised this fact that an answer sheet cannot be perfect, an exam cannot be perfect and similarly life too cannot be just perfect. But the spirit we carry decides how imperfections can prove to be bliss. Happiness is not the result of the perfect, it is the ingredient to a perfect life.

Many of us are driven by motives, desires and dreams but every time things don’t work out our way. But this doesn’t we will sit with a hung and pale face. We must rejoice for even the littlest blessing and achievement.

I am trying to rediscover happiness. Help me out. Tell me how do you define happiness or any experience that had left you with an insight about happiness.happiness is

Wish me luck!

Hey friends…

Sorry I could not post anything for some time. Actually I am in 12th and have my board exams-Its is a very crucial time for me and I need your wishes.

Will come back soon….!

Bye Bye

See you soon!

Liebster Award #1

Hello everyone! I have been a little busy due to my school and exams but I am back! So this is my second award and my first Liebster award!! I am so very excited and happy. A big big thanks to my dear friend and a wonderful blogger underthecandlelight for this nomination I just love her blogs and always wait for a new post. So before writing this post , I did a bit of research and I got to know that liebster means somebody who is dear to you and after that I feel much more happy!

So here are the rules….

And here are my answers…..

Who was the inspiration behind your blog ?
Hmmm….. the only thing that inspired me to  start writing a blog was a desire to share my thoughts and words with others and to have a space where I can freely express myself.

Your favourite colour and why ?

My favourite colour is blue. I don’t know why but somehow it always catches my attention and I feel a connect to it. And I also I always end up buying blue clothes 😉

What is the aim of your life ?
since my childhood, like every parent, my parents have done a lot for me.They have taken greatest of the pains to fulfill all my wishes and necessities. So I always that I grow up to give them a fulfilling life. YES I want to earn a lot of money, but for them so that I can fulfill all their wishes ! 

Who is your favourite blogger ?
HaHa…..you must ask who isn’t! But I feel a certain connect with lida’s musings.

Describe your ideal location .

Under a tree, beside a river.

What is something you can’t stay without ?
If its a thing, then’my tab’ frankly and if its a person, then ‘family’.

Which season excites you the most ?
Rainy season. The pitter patter of raindrops, the cold breeze and the rainbow fill me with with a lot of energy and positivity.

Describe one incident that brought a change to you .

A few years ago my grandfather met with an accident. It was impossible for him to survive as his brain  was severely injured but he did! That day I started believing in optimism, faith and that miracles do happen.

If you had to make a wish what it would be ?

Peace ……

Fire or water

Water for sure… its so calm and soothing!

Any advice you would like to share ?

Don’t cling on to your perspective. Try to understand other’s as well.

11 FACTS ABOUT MYSELF

I am a huge fan of optimism.

I like meeting new people and interacting with them.

I am a sleepy person.

I hate maths.

I love studying and exploring psychology.

The only fear I have is to see my dear ones in pain.

Crying makes me feel better.

I feel lack of freedom.

Stage is my second home.

GOD is my refuge.

I am really finding it difficult to write about myself…:P

My Questions remain same as charvi’s.

Finally Here are my Nominations…..

lida’s musings

Anjali soni

zerocreativity

falling again

Azura skies

So I am done with my first Liebster award. I have also been nomnated by the peculiar blog reader to which i would be replying shortly.

so till then …BE HAPPY AND ENJOY!!

Bye